“But why diminish your soul being run-of-the-mill at something? Mediocrity: now there is ugliness for you. Mediocrity’s a hairball coughed up on the Persian carpet of Creation.”
― Tom Robbins, Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas
I’m a big fan of Charles Bukowski. Not for his lewd behaviour, his foul mouth or his sexual conquests. No, the reason I ‘buy’ Buk is because he lived. Oh sure, it’s not the sort of life I’d could conceive but it’s why his writing his so real; namely, he’s cut through the layers and layers of social conditioning that militates against living true to our genius self.
And before you hit me with another ‘starving artist’ riff, I can tell you that that wasn’t his thing. Yes, he lived close to the edge but as he said in “Factotum”, an artist would much rather live off a steak and whiskey than a candy bar.
But what about you?
How close to the edge of true self do you live?
The thing is most people are waiting. Waiting for something better; waiting for a new day; or waiting until it ends.
There are many reasons why we choose to put things off but chief among those is money, closely followed by fear. We might have had some rough times but mostly we’re holding to the story that money maketh us and can just as easily destroy us. And so, we bury everything, stuff down our emotions and live a shadow life.
“What’s so wrong with what?”, I hear you ask.
Nothing in the sense it’s how most people live; and everything in the sense that when you look back on your life, you’ll rue the day you didn’t battle resistance, slay the inner critic and just let rip. Crass, stupid and crazy talk I know, but the moment we over think ‘it’, i.e. life, is the moment we die…slowly from the inside out.
But of course, I wouldn’t believe a word of what I say. I mean, what do I know?